The Wedding Industry Doesn't Need More Business Gurus. It Needs Better Questions.

I've spent a lot of time in rooms full of wedding professionals lately. Conferences, retreats, speaking engagements, and one-on-one conversations with business owners at completely different stages of their careers. And there's something I've been noticing. Everyone seems to be looking for the next thing that's going to help their business grow. A new strategy, a better system, another educational opportunity, or a mentor who can finally tell them what to do next.

I get it. I've been there, too. I've spent nearly a decade building my business, investing in education, learning from other professionals, and figuring things out through plenty of trial and error. I believe wholeheartedly in mentorship and continuing education. In fact, it's a huge part of the work I do today. But the longer I'm in this industry, the more I find myself asking a different question: Are we teaching people how to build successful businesses, or are we just teaching them how to become busier?

Somewhere along the way, the conversation around success became incredibly focused on growth. More weddings, bigger budgets, larger teams, higher revenue, and the next impressive milestone. And while there's absolutely nothing wrong with wanting those things, I think we're overlooking something important. Not everyone wants to build the same business, and not everyone should.

I've built teams in multiple markets, produced incredibly complex events, and reached milestones that a younger version of myself would have been thrilled about. But I've also learned firsthand that growth comes with responsibilities, sacrifices, and a version of your life that you might not have fully considered when you were chasing those goals. It's something I explore in my talk, The Cost of Being Capable, because sometimes being really good at what you do makes it incredibly easy to keep saying yes without stopping to ask whether you actually want everything that comes with it.

And that's where I think mentorship has an opportunity to be so much more meaningful.

When someone comes to me looking for guidance, I'm not particularly interested in teaching them how to build a replica of my business. I want to understand what they're trying to accomplish, what their finances actually look like, what parts of their work they love, and what kind of life they want outside of it. Sometimes the answer is growth. Sometimes it's better systems, stronger boundaries, fewer events, or simply learning how to make more money without taking on more work.

I also think we need to be more intentional about who we're learning from. Being an incredible wedding planner doesn't automatically make someone an incredible business mentor. There's a difference between sharing what worked for you and having the experience, curiosity, and ability to help someone figure out what will work for them.

Before investing in another course, conference, or mentorship program, I'd encourage every wedding professional to ask themselves what they're actually hoping to change. Are you looking for someone to validate what you're already doing, or are you willing to have someone challenge the way you're thinking? Are you trying to build a bigger business because that's genuinely what you want, or because it's what you've been taught success is supposed to look like?

I love this industry, and I love seeing people invest in themselves. But I think we owe it to the next generation of wedding professionals to talk about sustainability just as much as we talk about success. Building something impressive is wonderful. Building something that actually works for you is even better.

The right mentor shouldn't teach you how to build their version of success. They should help you figure out what your own looks like.

And sometimes, that starts with asking better questions.

If you want to know more, I actually speak on this publicly. If you're planning an association event or would like me to come speak at your local association event or conference, please feel free to message me. I'd love to continue this conversation with your community.